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Photo by Trevor Cole on Unsplash

After living all over the world, I am convinced the majority of people I’ve met are one-of-a-kind humans that cannot be replicated again, yet lack the self-awareness to personally grow through experience and assimilation of other cultures, people, and ideas.

In other words, society has blotted out their special. Their tribe of frogs taught them to lose their own colors, their own ideas, their own food, and the rich connection of authenticity that links them to their community.

Many frogs out there play society’s rat race consumption game in exchange for looking special to their peers. So what does special really mean?

Merriam Webster’s Definition of special

1: distinguished by some unusual quality; especially : being in some way superior

  • our special blend

2: held in particular esteem

  • a special friend

3a : readily distinguishable from others of the same category : unique

  • they set it apart as aspecial day of thanksgiving

b : of, relating to, or constituting a species : specific

4: being other than the usual : additional, extra

5: designed for a particular purpose or occasion

The frog thinks at first his home is superior to the turtle’s, but actually he isn’t special. The turtle retorts his special place is better. And so we move along the subjective special spectrum, the turtle isn’t special to you, yet it is special to me. The frog thinks its home is really special, but it really isn’t.

There are 360 degrees of subjectivity, of right and wrong, yet we fight for our limited view and experience of the world. Meanwhile, greed runs the upper echelon of American society, we think it’s special to buy a puppy for $800 which brings us happiness while kids don’t eat or have education in different countries. To buy a new car from a CEO and company that makes millions while children soldiers shoot each other over the resources those countries represent. I am guilty of wanting to show my special to the world, yet I’m not special when I act this way.

I am not special because of what I wear, or own, or look like. I feel special if I grow or help others grow, find their true self, and become what they want.

Does our subjective experience matter while we are on our journey of special?

Maybe the frog is special in other ways, that it didn’t know about.

Does understanding you make me special? Listening? Caring? Helping?

Not understanding is basic. Common. Indistinguishable. Caring, listening, understanding, and opening your mind to the world more makes you special. It creates a sense of team. Allows room for growth. Immigrants to sexuality to vulnerability become a thread of commonality, even from different sides of the globe.

Can you walk away from my frog pond and still feel special? Connected?

Does a liberal that can’t talk to a conservative make them feel special?

Does a conservative that only believes their way is right feel special?

360 different directions to start our path to special, does any one of them matter?

I believe self-awareness, empathy, understanding, acceptance, and accountability make a special tribe of frogs. Average frogs just follow their herd, never questioning their bodies, their jobs, their eating habits, what pond or ocean they want to live in, or their life’s direction.

In this case, I believe the frog deserves some “special” credit for engaging the turtle. I mean, the dude fainted!

Would you agree most strangers don’t treat other strangers with respect, kindness, curiosity, and listen to their stories or needs?

Accountability to understand, move, see, sympathize, empathize, instead of apathize (why isn’t this a word) takes this frog to special in my book. This frog, when it wakes up, will feel special by raising it’s awareness to engage and have experiences most frogs won’t have.

Not listening and learning from all the living things from our universe, stunts our special from blossoming. Our non-special quality is doing and thinking and living in a way that the average human does. Sucked into the suck of the rat race. Consuming to consume. Beating the Jones. Living in the familiar, in thinking they (or their tribe of frogs) is right and everyone else is wrong.

This type of thinking may make you feel special due to the similar frog colony you live in, but that isn’t what this frog is doing is it?

This frog dude (or chick) invited the turtle in. Most frogs I know don’t invite me in, share their resources, or listen to my ribbit-ribbit.

Unfortunately, most humans don’t know how special they can be because their limited to swimming in their frog pond and not interacting with the turtles of the world. Yet, if frogs are willing to learn and be open to turtles, by my definition, makes them special.

Shirley, if this frog isn’t special, I want to meet him/her and thank them for listening and inviting my weird turtle ass in to their see their life and listen to mine.

Telling people they aren’t special isn’t as important as holding them accountable to figuring out what makes them special in the first place — to make them question their spectrum of subjective reality relative to the tribe of frogs they live in. If they begin embracing empathy, kindness, and love the differences of all tribes, yet celebrating their own subjective experience with awareness while letting go of being right and wrong to embrace the differences and celebrate the values of those around them.

PS. The frog invited the turtle in. The frog listened. That’s a special quality in itself. Most humans are just swimming in their pond without a connection to any other humans of difference, ethnicity, or creed.

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“Do it or don’t do it.”

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